Dating Sites From the Male Perspective

By: H.T., H.T.’s Blog


Without a doubt, as far as dating apps and sites go, this one is the most infamous as far as its effect on dating as a whole. Fact is, Tinder is and was never built to find you love, and that’s okay as frankly holding up the illusion that we all are always looking for love is kind of bullshit in the big picture of things. But the inherent problem with it isn’t that it exists, it’s that as an average looking guy, this site humbles you like a motherfucker as far as looks. And with looks, you can’t deny that such things factor into why so many men tap out the dating world on the whole. It’s not that dating is impossible if you’re average looking, it’s that it FEELS harder when you realize that you, the average looking guy has to build character and skills but you watch as guys better looking than you, taller than you, and yes more seemingly charming than you get way more attention from women. What I think isn’t explained is that it’s cool to envy that guy if all you want is a hot girlfriend. As I’ve learned, not every good man comes in a tall good looking body, but not every woman that is a good match comes in the body of 1996 Claudia Schiffer.

But that’s why Tinder sucks particularly as far as what makes one build their confidence as this app lets you know off break that you are an average to below average looking guy, and that your going to have to accept that just finding sex will be harder because frankly there very well could be someone out there that likes you for you, but honestly, it sucks knowing that they probably aren’t going to look like a model. Does that honestly matter in the long run? Not really, but let’s not pretend that primary attraction doesn’t exist and that having to force yourself to go on blind dates even when you know what they look like isn’t just a tad bit annoying. It’s not impossible to find a woman that’s less than the ideal looks wise for most men, it’s that on sites like this, you kinda get the feeling that your female counterpart has it easier finding men than you have finding women. But with that, I kind of have to point out that within you lies the answer to why that’s a thing: guys are horny bastards. Is that a bad thing? Not always, get a man horny enough but give him certain mindsets or tools and you could have results ranging from building a dam to the nuclear bomb. Yes, I stole a Doug Stanhope joke.


OKCupid is an interesting place as far as dating goes. Here, it is somewhat easier to find someone who matches more with you personality wise, but it does get a bit…tricky. Tricky as it starts to create a very interesting set of who you get as matches, especially politically. For me, I consider myself more leftist than center left liberal. Which means there isn’t a huge shortage of women on the site who share my views or at least can see where I’m coming from. The tricky part, as explained to me by my more right wing friends is that OKCupid isn’t full of the more, shall we say traditionalist women. They’re there, but if you’re trying to find such women on there, most of the time what you’ll get are women like Michelle Malkin or Candice Owens, authoritarians if you will. All the Tomi Lahren women are trying to get black liberal dick. God help you if you look like Sebastian Gorka and try out there. For leftists, it turns into a situation where you have to read dating profiles closely and google a few quotes on their pages, otherwise you find yourself asking out the dreaded RadFem Tankie. As for women with kids, that’s actually not the worse case scenario. The worst case scenario is being someone who gets a bunch of likes and now you have to pay for a month of premium membership just to find your matches.


I’m not going to lie: this site sucks ass. Not because it’s the poor mans Tinder, but because the site actually offers you WORSE women in almost an aggressive manner. It’s one thing to ask what my job is, it’s another to ask if I drive, it’s another when they ask how much you make, but when it feels as though the algorithm that matches me up is both more random than Tinder (Tinder at least gives me the option to limit my matches by physical range) but now it feels like you’ve purposely picked women for me that by no means are a good match, I am left to question how this is supposed to actually work or if it’s supposed to work period. Don’t get me wrong, I met plenty of attractive women on POF, not all were bots or trying to buy weed, but the fact was these were women that were….yeah. Also, let’s not bullshit like this site is not mainly built for manwhores to find a new catch, that and Badoo and Bumble. I would have mentioned Bumble earlier, but the difference between Bumble and Tinder is that Bumble actively forces you to jockey for the women on said sites attention. Like seriously. POF just GIVES you easy to fuck women if you’re halfway decent looking. If your just a regular guy trying to find love, you’re probably better off elsewhere as you’ll end up like me and be labeled free food. Trust me.

Facebook Dating Groups

The great failure of Facebook dating sites, in a nutshell is this: if it’s nerds, it’s a sausage fest. That’s it. Any Facebook dating group that is exclusively for nerds to find dates is a bust off break because frankly amongst nerds, nerdy men are the most unsexy bastards possible and frankly I’m not shocked that the women in many circles are either essentially lesbians or asexual as frankly a lot of male nerd are a bit cringy. As for normies that try to date on Facebook, let me just say that dating groups are FAR worse than any dating site as frankly the margin by which to get caught in a lie is so high yet it’s done on the regular in said groups. Seriously, a man can go into a group to find a date just in his area, only to find out all the women in said group have been inboxing the same 10 guys in said group, only for every few months 1 of those guys gets exposed as being in a relationship, having kids or even being fucking married! And yet they still get nowhere. I’m not saying DON’T be better, I’m saying if you DO better, Facebook is the worse place to find love even more so. See, I could get a better job, clean up, improve myself, all these things, but I know that my best bet would be on a PAID dating site like as there would be a marker for what kind of people get to be on said site. Facebook is by far the lowest of the low to use as dating groups can’t help but attract the worst of the worst the site has to offer.

So what’s the solution?

The only answer I can come up with with any degree of confidence is just tap out of dating if only for a bit, for as much as I hate to say it, dating in a world where women don’t have to settle or men don’t objectively have to go be these “alpha males” is that frankly there isn’t really a huge need for us as a generation of men to necessarily go out, get rejected, then take out our anger towards women online. Frankly the reason I reject going MGTOW is because those are men that frankly refuse to understand that life and dating especially are not fair, and that being shorted in some way is a conspiracy and not just what happens when, socially anyways, we become less tolerant of a society where women are expected to take it on the chin repeatedly and men are supposed to just get away essentially with murder. Honestly, if you ever wondered how we got all these Pookie and Ray Ray ass dudes that do nothing but CREATE single moms and do far more damage to society than women raising children without a father figure, it’s because as a society we kept raising a society of men with entitlement to women and their bodies and no one checked them. I don’t care what your book or your bible says, that shit ain’t cool.

I wouldn’t necessarily say give up so much as I’d say go find something you’d like to do and go do it if you can’t get a girlfriend. But for the love of god, enough with the misogyny.

Articles submitted by freelance writers. If you would like to submit an article to the Onyx Truth, please click on the SUBMISSIONS link at the very top of the site for more info.
%d bloggers like this: