Aquaman Movie Review

By:  Black Conservative (@BlackConservative93)

If you think the Aquaman movie is worth your time or that this is DCEU’s saving grace (after time-after-time of poorly scripted plots), then you would disappointed. This film is not for wannabe film critics or diehard fans, rather family gathering of people who know nothing about comic books.

Aquaman was marketed as a new twist to traditional hero flicks. He was light-hearted and entertaining, yet not quite as violent as Deadpool. Jason Momoa tried his ride on his multicultural attraction, but his acting is horrible.

The audience is tortured with flatline dialogue and puns that fall on deaf ears. There many times I looked back for at least a small chuckle. Patrick Wilson plays Ocean Master, the half-brother of Aquaman. He is the clique supervillain who just wants to destroy the world for an incomplete idea (of ridding the surface world of littering humans), meanwhile Atlantis does the same thing as everyone else from the surface world.

The plot is a weird love triangle that is one-sided. For starters, Atlanna left her Atlantis to escape an arranged marriage and she happens to get washed ashore by a lighthouse to be saved by a random. Somehow, they fall in love and Aquaman was born. The forbidden seed of two species that were not supposed to meet, which does not even make sense because people from Atlantis were humans just like us, but somehow adapted to living underwater. Eventually, the Atlantisian army find and arrest Altanna for her betrayal to the King and nation. Ocean Master was born and Altanna was assumed dead by execution. We never know or see Ocean Master’s father, the audience has to make rash assumptions that he must be a jerk because no real man would never use an arranged marriage to get laid. It is even sadder that there was no love between the two (Ocean Master and Altanna). As Ocean Master and Aquaman have a death match, Altanna begs the two to stop fighting, but Ocean Master is left in the cold as he is imprisoned and loses his people’s trust.

Atlanna is an unreliable mother, but better yet a lowkey bitch. I just did not like the film’s direction of forcing me to dislike a villain just because they are a villain. There are too many gaps in the story.

And if you think Atlanna’s love triangle is bad, Mera takes the cake. She has to be the worst love interest in a superhero film as she follows the same destiny as Atlanna and another arranged marriage blunder. Mera was the wife of Ocean Master. It is never clear if Ocean Master abused her in anyway, but the gaps do not help so again we hate the villain for no reason. Of course, Mera and Aquaman do not even have real chemistry as love scenes are rushed. Mera just seems to be the naive woman who just wants to explorer and test her options. She clings to Aquaman to warn him that the surface world is endangered by the evil forces of Atlantis. I am just at awe on how two brothers can share the same girl.

She just sees Aquaman as a shiny boytoy for excitement. Ocean master is a screwed over villain, it is even sympathetic; I can neither understand his logic to world domination let alone his hatred for Aquaman, I mean shouldn’t he have been killed years ago.

Yet, you would be surprised that Oceanmaster is not the biggest loser in the film. Black Manta takes that prize with a shitty villain origin. Apparently, his grandfather was in the Navy and left America due to overtones of racism to become a pirate. I do not get it, either, but let’s roll with it. His son, Jesse Kane, was entrusted with the manta blade that is now passed down to his son (Black Manta) before Kane’s death, during a botched submarine heist. Kane is pinned, while Aquaman refuses to save him. Black Manta begs him to save his father. Aquaman sees this as punishment for raising his son to be a criminal. This creates a hatred towards Aquaman. It was so forced and completely avoidable, I mean the whole heist was to get his attention anyways.

Somehow, Ocean Master rewards Black Manta with Atlantisian technology.  Black Manta reverse-engineers to create his iconic custom. The suit is ugly and clunky. It is obvious that the large helmet would be a weak spot and an easy way to get a concussion. I felt like I was watching Mortal Kombat 2, the live-action film with the appearance of Sector and Cyrax.

The film’s trailers showed the Italian chase scene, which was nothing special in full length. At the end credits scene, the film teases a part 2 with Black Manta wanting to kill and figure out who is Aquaman. Which is dumb because he does not wear a mask and secondly, he can at least be easily found in Atlantis because he is the king. It is not like Aquaman has a personal life that he has to keep secret, there is even a scene where locals in his small town ask to take pictures with him.

DC needs to end the DCEU and stick with producing CW hero series. Shows like the Flash, Arrow and Black Lightning have huge fanbase. Sometimes it is smart and best for business to know when to pull and let Marvel dominate.