The Derrick Jaxn Problem of Black Facebook Dating Groups

By:  H.T., Website:  Rogue Black Nerd

As I said before about the kinds of people you encounter in Facebook groups, they all come with their own upsides and pratfalls.  But all in all, there is one type of person in these groups that I hate with a bitter passion as he clearly causes more harm than good by any stretch of the imagination.  I’m of course talking about the Derrick Jaxn’s of Facebook dating groups.

See, one would assume that the anger I have towards such men is based out of the feeling of, “How dare a black man stand up for black women!  He is just caping for pussy!”  No, it’s more like these kinds of men are by leaps and bounds far far worse than any sort of troll these groups could produce.  As I just voluntarily left a Facebook singles group, I can say that first hand black Facebook groups are flawed in many ways that isn’t observed by those that benefit.  The biggest way being that women in said groups outnumber men 3 to 1 at the lowest, and because the pickings are higher for women, there is an inherent slant in terms of the social power dynamic in said groups being that should there be issues in said group that can only be solved by an admin, if it’s a man and certain things happen in said group under his watch, he must either purge said group or possibly watch the balance of said groups gender dynamics fall out of whack and suffer from watching the group be reduced to a sausage fest, and in the end chaos.

Enter the Derrick Jaxn.  For those of you who do not know who he is, I would take the time to watch a few of his videos then watch every Facebook comedian spot on roast him with how blatantly he panders and ignores all logic with purely ad hominem arguments.  The way it typically ruins black Facebook dating groups is that men like him come in and frankly ruin any and all attempts at creating any real dialogue between black men and women by pumping up their ego and justifying any and all women’s arguments with, yup, ad hominem arguments.  I saw this recently with a black dating group I was in and I came to a pretty sad conclusion:  I’m really not cut out for predominantly black dating circles as all it takes is one of these kinds of guys to come in and sell them all a dream and, boom, if I wanted to date black women, they all aren’t interested in me now because fuck me for not being like that guy.

But they’ll say, “We like him because he is actually calling out other men’s misogynoir.  You just revel in it.”  No, I’m not a man who thinks that staying on the good side of a few women outweighs my right to say what I want.  If the consequence is that none of a particular group of women don’t fuck with me, fine.  But that’s not why I’m angry with these kinds of guys.  My anger is that clearly this is a man who has risen high in the datability ranks mainly because he’s a yes man to all your pedantic and esoteric views about men, and stays up there because he’s physically attractive.  I bring up the looks issue because the thing that sets a Derrick Jaxn apart from a Jeremy D. Johnson is that the women pander to actually want to fuck the Derrick.  Proof of this is that the guy in this group was an ok looking guy and he and men like him in said group got all the attention because clearly these were the men that played into a fantasy on some level and left the rest of us saying how much we love the women of this group and backing up their ideas and arguments and never responding to our friend requests or DMs.  The problem isn’t that they reject men like us, it’s that you can’t sell what is clearly the lower tier of men in said group on being more progressive and woke, see us being more woke and see that the only men in said group getting any attention are the men who we see look better than us or panders better than us.  In short, there’s not a huge incentive to be a better man when it’s clear as day that at best, we only make existing in said group far better for you, but here we are, sitting her annoyed and ignored in said group.  Meanwhile, for the women…

People will say I’m angry.  And I’m not.  I can already see the comments for this being how I’m ashy, how I’m bitter because I used to be a fake male feminist, and you know what?  Fuck it.  Final note, if your all going to troll me over this shit, here’s what I look like.  Have fun with the jokes.