I Am a Western Man, So I Like Western Women

By:  Asher Primus

Black men on YouTube and in pro-black Facebook groups have had heated debates among themselves over their ideal version of the perfect black woman.

The term “westernized” has been thrown around as a definition to describe colonialism and “white people’s” culture.  Hoteps and black feminists want to distant themselves completely from white people.  If white people go left, black people will go right; regardless of if the path chosen is longer and more of a burden.  They have a hard time admitting that sometimes the white man is right.

When I was in grade school I was interested in sex, but I knew nothing about it.  My only concept of sex had to be respectability like the missionary or a PG-13 sex scene.  Despite the commonality of oral sex (the concept of women giving men blowjobs), my inexperience was obvious.  I remember listening to a television show of a Hebrew Israelite giving sermons on the true meaning of the Bible.  On one episode, regarding sex, oral and anal were compared as “dog” or caveman behavior that black people did not need to engage.  Over time, I envied the energetic sex life of my friends and rappers.  I wanted to be like them.  Overtime, I understand the power dynamics of blowjobs through listening to Tariq Nasheed and other men.  It was a rite of passage to manhood.  When she goes down on her knees, she is submitting and allowing herself to be yours.

Oral was a big thing when I was in high school as every now and then, some girl would get caught giving a group of boys head.  I was a naïve kid who did not understand what women found appeal in the act.  Even with homosexuality, black men cannot lie and say that they never wanted a threesome from two women.  “We love lesbians,”, as chanted on The Jerry Springer Show.  The truth is that white men have taught black men how to fuck.  So, I do not want to hear hoteps with their Ankh’s claiming they wanted invented sex.  Hence, why I do not have much of an attraction to hotep or black feminists, I do not like bulky dreadlocks, appropriated piercings and body modifications or unshaved arm hair.

Being a hotep/conscious bored me.  As much as I want to be into African culture, it was not fair that I was told not to take part in so-called “western” practices.  The problem is that the sex life of a hotep dude does not appeal to me, due to how conscious couples preset themselves.  I am not attracted to those women.  There is no media promotion that drives me compared to the Instagram models I follow.  The conscious community cannot expect black men to let go of “white culture” when it has prestige and serves as eye candy.  It is like trying to convince a 16-year-old boy to prefer women like India Arie over those like Rihanna.  Granted, it is noble to offset colorism, but these boys are seeing correlations between attractive women and sex.  Getting with theoretical traditional Afrocentric women seems more of a charity than general attraction.

Reverting to B.C. century concepts of sex and again the conscious vision of women is boring.  Who wants to waste their lives reading religious text and dedicating more time to God than their wives?  I cannot help but to like western women because I am a western man.  Becky to the average African American woman, most of them want sexual validation.  They are willing to prove that they are down for whatever.  The white man is the real sex god because how did he turn torture to a multi-million-dollar sex industry as kink and bondage that are household practices thanks to 50 Shades of Grey?  Watching porn directed white men is interesting and inspiring.  Yes, black women love bondage, dancing or whatever fetish as it is entertaining to see them out perform white women’s sexuality.

“Westernism” does not have to be a bad thing, I live in America where most people are idolizing and copying off of each other.  I Know I will slammed by the hotep police, but Westernism is winning and foreign wants in.  My type of women is someone of color with at least a mixture of African America, short hair like a pixie cut, tattoos, wears fishnets stockings and lingerie, likes to twerk and light-skinned (please spare me the self-hate card).  But even the attraction to light-skinned is supposed to be a western concept and I say who cares.  Hoteps and black feminists have not sold me into buying the concept of this African family from a mythical timeline when we were gods over the earth.  Men just want power and more so a happy sex life.

I will admit America is oversexed and preys on the brokenness of black women.  It is sad to discover that they have been violated.  The temporary sexual release from seeing a black woman strip for $20 lap dances does not bother me, but as much as I like the strip club I do hate the average patron.  These me are old enough to be my father, yet they are pursuing women around my age.  Sometimes her sexuality is not genuine and is more of a response to rape or molestation as sex is their only expression of love.  Most of my female friends have been raped or molested.  It is a scary truth.  Western sexuality does have its drawback.