When Fa Sho/No Mo Becomes No Mo Fa Sho

Happy New Year to all of my readers and supporters!!  I’m a few weeks late, but it’s cool.

I was having a conversation the other day with one of my homeboys about how we matured in our dealings while dating women.  I’m using the term “dating” as a general term…if you know what I mean.  The topic came up while jokingly discussing the lack of lovely lady choices to be boo’ed up with during the recent ‘Snowzilla’ that affected the northeast.

I recall saying that I really didn’t have any good choices…LOL.  I had obviously failed to recruit a star player during the Cuffing Season Draft.  To be honest, all choices aren’t good choices.  Maturity and experience led to that deduction.

Later in the convo, we discussed how we sometimes practiced the motto, “Fa Sho/No Mo” in our younger days.  For those who don’t know what I mean, I will expound (as PG-rated as I can).  The premise of the motto is that when presented with multiple possible options for female companionship most likely to include pleasurable physical activity (ya feel me?) during a certain time period, you choose the one that has the highest propensity to give guaranteed satisfaction with little or no work (hence the ‘Fa Sho’ part).  Determining factors include:  verbal cues by participants, past experiences with participants, availability, lowest drama level, attraction, etc.  The ‘No Mo’ part is simple in that an error in judgement and choice may lead to a failed opportunity to secure any companionship during that time.  To state the phrase in its non-abbreviated form (and PG-rated), it means “Pursue the sure thing for fun, physical activity because if you choose wrong, you may end up alone and desiring companionship since both options are no longer viable.”

To give an example, let’s say a fling from your past is whispering in your ear all night about wanting that ‘old thing back’ (fa sho), but you are considering spitting some game to a new prospect because she is more attractive or your crush on her is motivating you.  Let’s say you chose to roll the dice on your new crush therefore blowing off the guaranteed good time (aka “The Fa Sho”).  During your attempt, you find out that she is not willing or available for whatever reason.  It’s cool, but in the meantime, the window to backtrack to “The Fa Sho” has closed.  So, it is the end of the night and the urge to indulge in lust goes unfulfilled.  You took a gamble and lost all chances of winning, per se, hence the ‘No Mo’ portion of the statement.

Now that I have explained that, back to the conversion with my homeboy.  I stated that as my tolerance for drama and games has lowered over the years, I started placing peace of mind over a piece of….(ya feel me?).  I could have pursued a past participant or gambled on a new prospect, but choosing wrong is definitely not wanted at my age and current mindset (especially when you don’t know how long you may be snowed in with that person).  I could have played myself and threw a thirsty bid at someone who I no longer deal with like that, but why?  I guess that I no longer keep a roster of potentials like I did in my twenties.  I now find satisfaction in being alone and not dealing with any of the choices or the bullshit that may accompany the choices.

No need to play with a female’s emotions (or mine). Shiii…I would rather play video games in my underwear all night than to have an annoying, clingy, or unruly woman stuck around me all night.  Hell, I may not be entertaining enough or have enough chips and cookies in the cupboard or something.  Regardless, I’m ok with that.

There are always choices, but it comes to a point that one doesn’t want to deal with drama, problems, etc. that may come with those choices.  Inversely, there probably ain’t too many locals right now that may want to deal with my perceived drama, problems, lack of chips and cookies in the cupboard, etc.  I’m just keeping it real.  LOL…no “Netflix and Chill” for me….something more like “Ima Chill and Watch Netflix”.

In summary, I guess I have gotten to the point that I have ‘No Mo Fa Sho’ since I don’t have someone who I call for that guaranteed good time…and I’m ok with that.