Three Secrets to Keeping People


The word appreciate actually means to raise in value.  When you appreciate a person, they actually become more valuable and more successful.  Think about the people you value, and then think about ways to let them know.  Everyone wants to know that whatever they bring to the table, has value.  While there’s a million ways to do it, here’s a few basic ways show appreciation:

  1. Don’t keep someone in a holding pattern.  Don’t keep them waiting, if you can help it.
  2. Thank them.  Thank with the sincere “thank you” rather than the routine “thanks”.
  3. Don’t play the pronoun game — use their name.
  4. Treat people as unique, special, and you know, valuable.

To depreciate or to neglect, is the opposite of appreciation.  Everyone wants to be treated well based on their own merit.  If Suzie thinks “all men are the same” for example, this will flood into her interactions with all men and she’s going to get the predictable results of all guys quitting her.  Likewise, If James “says that to all of the girls,” then the woman finding this out will feel depreciated.  You are not dealing with people, you are dealing with specific individuals who have something unique to bring the the table.  People is a general, abstract concept.  The person, is special and unique.  Don’t carry the baggage from past individuals and attempt to place that upon the shoulders of the new.  Responsibility is heavy enough, and to bestow negative traits of others onto someone else is not fair to anyone.

In the military there is this story of the arrogant General who was asked what type of map he needs for the battlefield.  The technician mapmaker had a “general map” and a “special map” on hand.  Of course, the pompous officer demanded the “General map”, and of predictably he lost many men on that battlefield.  Don’t be the General using a “General” map navigating through men and women in the world.  Instead, be smart and use the “Special” map to deal with specific people, because you value the terrain, if you get my drift.

Photo Credit: Johnny Silvercloud

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