Father’s Day and the Haters who Follow

Happy Father’s Day, Dad

First and foremost, I like to say happy Father’s Day to all those fathers who actually are gainfully employed as quote and unquote, “dad”.  I myself was raised by my father — a single father — so I can speak on the value of such treasure.  So again, happy Father’s Day to all those fathers out there.  The position of a father is unlike the mother.  Based on human sexual dimorphism, a woman is bound to be a mother from conception.  So from a psychological standpoint, she is developing a relationship with that child from Day One; everything she eats or allows her body to absorb is shared with the child before birth.  She has to be very mindful of her child.  A father’s position starts simply when he decides to to take responsibility for life, as any man should.  A father is made when he decides not to run off.  A father is simply the actual definition of what a man is.  Fatherhood is the defining moment in a man’s life.  A father’s position starts when he decides to not take the easy route.  A father is born when that man makes peace with the fact that he is active in raising a child — whether it’s his biologically or not.   So because fatherhood is a choice, and a decision that men can run from, for those who choose to be actual fathers I thank you.

Father’s Day Haters

Now, there’s a lot of brick-of-ocean-sea-salt ass broads out there who hate on Father’s Day.  I’m here to stop you.  I’m here the tell you to shut the fuck up, sit your ass down, and despite the fact that some man did you wrong, you need to grow the hell up and get the fuck over it.  I am sorry that Father’s Day reminds you that some man broke your heart, and decided to not stay.  But again, if you are a single mother who wishes to hi-jack Father’s Day as if you piss standing up, I might remind you that YOU CHOSE that dumb motherfucker in the first place.  So don’t hate all men — all fathers — because the father of your child can’t stand your sour ass.  If you truly hate Father’s Day I suggest you become a staunch advocate of condom wearing.  In addition, you can always just not recognize Father’s Day, much like an atheist on Christmas day.

I’m here to also point out some common sense; a mother is a mother and a father is a father.  Just as a father does’t become a mother when a mother isn’t present, a mother doesn’t become a father when a father isn’t there.  While there’s a score of women who raise great men, you (the lady) cannot teach a man to be a man, as a father would.  A father is the first man a son or daughter comes across that accepts, appreciates and approves that child. Emphasis on “first man”.  No matter how hard you try, you will never replace an actual man.  An actual male identity in the household is something that you will NEVER be.  Unless you undergo a sex change of course, but why take it that far?  Stop being a tryhard.

Oh and that guy who tells you happy Father’s Day single mom?  He thinks you look nice and is probably trying to get laid.  Motherhood isn’t exactly rare, so if a guy is taking the time to wish you happy Father’s Day on Facebook or something, it’s highly likely that he sifted through all the known mothers on his 500+ friend list and decided you are one of the eleven best looking chicks he befriended.  He is more so celebrating the fact that you are AVAILABLE than anything else.  So no, he’s thinking with his dick, thirsty-man-logic doesn’t apply.

If you suffered the indignity of not having your father present in your own life, again, atheist to Christmas;  simply don’t recognize Father’s Day.

“Father’s Day is supposed to be a day to celebrate the fathers who are handling their business, not to complain about the baby daddies who aren’t.” ~ Anonymous

Father’s Don’t Get Enough Love

Father’s, like most male roles in general, doesn’t exactly need the same level of appreciation and approval as the female roles demand.  While we hear lady’s role approval all the time, you’re not going to hear too many fathers out there demanding some type of recognition for being dad.  They just simply exist. Including the single fathers.  Being raised by a single father I can testify that there’s nothing special given to a “single father”.  A single father is just simply a “dad”.  There’s no special recognition for single fathers; single dads don’t sit around lamenting over Mother’s Day, so perhaps… it’s the most mature thing to just let it go, and let fathers have their own day.  Celebrate the best men of our kind, not hate the fact that they exist outside of your life.  That’s quite selfish, and the condescending nature calling mothers fathers doesn’t help dads actually being dads.  If you don’t have a dad, be happy for those who do.  Allowing one to have something that you don’t, is the very definition of kindness.  And kindness is a whole lot more attractive than resentment.  And that’s the bigger picture.

Photo credit: Johnny Silvercloud